Be careful of the trigger

 

Budgeting Your Meals 101

 

Dating, Trump Style

 

A man who was one step closer to the edge and he broke

 

Think before you steal

 

Anyone else getting sick of Mila's Jim Beam ad?

 

Human Centipede - Now Available in Covfefe

 

Landau's out

 That's right, people. We've lost another of the greats - this time, it's Martin Landau (centre, blue left sleeve).

Listen to Freeman, people

 

It's all in the sauce

Instead of our usual thing, today I have for you a little cautionary tale about the importance of following instructions. Right now, I am in the process of giving a local Pizza Hut the scare of a lifetime. Why? Because they put BBQ sauce on my pizza after I asked them to leave it off. Even though I do like BBQ sauce, I think their Meatlovers pizza just looks and tastes better without it. So what I did was make them think that I had had an allergic reaction to something in the BBQ sauce and had to go to hospital. So just be careful and follow the customer's instructions otherwise you risk putting them in the hospital for real.

This is both idiotic and very stupid

 

Three nations, three triggers

 

Gangbanging, Italian Style

 

Lest we forget that Brazil can be beaten

 

Dollars and cents celebrating the big 50

 

And I thought Americans were stupid

 

That's it - I'm definitely becoming a woman

But not because of this - or is it?

 

They're all so dumb and pointless

 

On the 75th anniversary of her exodus to the Secret Annex

 

Something big is coming

 

Here's to another 241 years of covfefe

 

And which one am I again?

 

Starry Starry Wars

 

150 years of standing on guard for thee

 

Terrorists get terrorised

The Bellend of the Month for June 2017 is Moutia Elzahed, the burqa-wearing wife of a convicted terrorist recruiter. The NSW District Court has ruled Elzahed, along with her husband and teenage sons, must pay $95,000 to the Federal Police and more than $150,000 to NSW police. The ruling comes after Ms Elzahed lost her bid to sue both agencies last December over claims of assault during a counter-terrorism raid on her Revesby home. She claimed she was punched and handcuffed in an 'aggressive and hurtful manner' when police stormed her south-western Sydney home in September 2014. And they have 28 days to pay up. Serves them right, but you try coming up with $250,000 in 28 days.

It's New Zealand's Cup once again!

 

Ignorance is not necessarily bliss

 

Cyka blyat. Cyka blyat indeed.

 

The Boy who Lived for 20 Years

 

Hey Priscilla, what do you call a three-humped camel?

 

This is Bush's doing - and I mean both Bushes

 

Luckiest. Break. Ever.

 

Tak dat

 

The Nutkicker

 

A girl on a train reading about a girl on a train

 

That here is the true definition of spastic

And here it is: some piece of crap parking their gay sports car in the handicapped space without the right permit, while handicapped people make handicapped faces.
 

Evolution in a nutshell

Put this in your Bibles, naysayers. 

Breaking the Law 101

 

Here it is guys - the final word on pineapple pizza

 

Pig and human DNA just don't splice

 

Adaptor-ception

Micro SD to SD to USB to USB-C - when did it get this bad?

 

Guess who's no longer late for anal?

 

Countries out of ideas

 

We may have lost a Batman, but we also lost the idiot who invented pineapple pizza

But now we have a new enemy on our hands: corn on pizza.

 

Next level savage courtesy of Domino's and whoever placed this order

 

Hung like a parliament

 

Be warned Trump - the sun will always set on an empire

 

What next, #prayforprayer?

 

And this is why stingrays should be made extinct

 

Island-ception

 

On this site, exactly 28 years ago, "nothing" happened

 

Here is the true test of self-control

 

Orange leader invents covfefe

This week US President Donald Trump tweeted, "Despite the constant negative press covfefe." Within 20 minutes, it had been retweeted 13,000 times, liked 16,000 times, and "covfefe" was trending worldwide. So what is covfefe? A typo of coverage? The tweet was sent about midnight in Washington, so maybe a plea for coffee? His password? It seemed even the POTUS did not know, tweeting just after 6am DC time, "Who can figure out the true meaning of 'covfefe'???" I bet it means something rude.

Winter is officially here

But despite the disaster of the Trump presidency, progressive ideas are winning. More and more Americans want the minimum wage to be a living wage. They want to create millions of good jobs rebuilding crumbling infrastructure. They want a Medicare-for-all health care system. They want to make public colleges and universities tuition free. They want to transform our energy system away from fossil fuel. They want the wealthy to begin paying their fair share of taxes. They want criminal justice reform and comprehensive immigration reform. Real change will not be led from Washington, DC. It will be led at the grassroots level in 50 states throughout the country. Just keep up the pressure, and it will transform the country.

But it's not just for the country - the world would be fine if it wasn't for capitalism. Productivity sets the limit of population growth.  As we all know, politicians and business lead the calls for "growth", because this is the measure of a successful economy. Only problem is the issue of population increase is conveniently forgotten in this argument.

As is clearly demonstrated, we are desperately seeking another planet. Why? Because we know we are consuming all the world's resources but we are unwilling to question the fundamental tenets of advanced capitalist society. The failure of the socialist revolution of the 20th century has tarnished the natural alternative to capitalism; socialism. We must again begin this discussion, with lessons learnt from past mistakes, to create a viable alternative to neoliberal capitalism.

The terrain is vast and open, the tools of change have already been created. Our will can create freedom while still building a cage. Personal freedoms can exist in so many ways and I see capitalism as a prison for many of these.

By caging capital forces we can subordinate them to our needs, and never again be an appendage of the machine. We can engage in activities outside of wage labour and consumerism without fear or shame. Personal choice would be increased at the same rate as decreased dependence on wage labour. There would be an alternative, a baseline existence, a place for everyone. Enter the cage to compete to top up and succeed.  That is my dream.

OK so how does this translate to votes? Let us throw a few policy ideas out there:

1. A 4 day standard working week with a view to reducing this to 3 over time.

2. The regulation of the illicit drug market and an end to the "war on drugs". This will signal an ideological revolutution.

3. Lifelong education as the centre piece of our new world, and learning that extends beyond the limitation of the market.

4. With prison capacity high due to the end of ideological drug incarcerations, real criminals who inflict harm on others can be dealt with appropropriately. Domestic violence would be targeted as the number 1 priority of a new system.