And at the end, a ring swallower

The Bellend of the Month for July 2012 is Angela Winters Hardman. She was charged with theft earlier this month after an incident in May where she swallowed a US$4,000 diamond ring at a Salt Lake City department store before pawning it for US$600 when it passed through her system. This is one of the sneakiest ways I know to steal stuff, but at least she was caught on camera swallowing the ring then switching it with a bogus ring. Theft is theft and I hope they send her to jail for it. But at least she didn't dress up as the Joker and shoot up the store.

WEEKLY GROSS-OUT: Baby snatching

Ann Pettway, a woman who snatched a newborn baby from a New York City hospital more than two decades ago and raised her as her own, will be sentenced today at 2:30pm (Eastern Daylight Time). Pettway, who pleaded guilty to a kidnapping charge in February, will learn her fate from a Manhattan federal court judge. During her February court appearance, she offered details of the 1987 kidnapping. She said she took a train from her Connecticut home to Harlem Hospital, where she scooped up 3-week-old Carlina White, who had been brought to the emergency room by her parents. Snatching babies is just wrong. Even if you can't get pregnant, even if you want revenge against the child's parents for something they did to you several years ago, even if you believe you will be a better parent than the child's birth parents, it is still kidnapping and no parent should ever have to suffer this misfortune. But at least Carlina eventually found, and got to spend time with, her real mother.

Unborn goes to the Joker

Ashley Moser, a pregnant Colorado woman who took a bullet to the stomach and lost her 6-year-old daughter Veronica in the “Dark Knight” rampage, has suffered a second tragedy: the death of her unborn child. But there's been another gunman on the prowl: Daryl Benway of Oxford, Massachusetts. Yesterday, he drove to his wife’s home and shot his 7-year-old daughter, Abigail, killing her. He also fired on his 9-year-old son, Owen, but he survived. Benway then took his own life. His wife found out about the horrific crime when she returned home to find police cruisers and television crews around her house. Seriously, everyone, America does not need more gunmen. Guns are a good deterrent but when abused, they just cause problems like what happened in Colorado last week. In other news, a 45-year-old man, who Oklahoma City police arrested last month on charges of panhandling, says he makes US$60,000 a year begging for money. How's that for "not a real job"?

What a Joker

A 28-year-old Maryland man named Neil Prescott repeatedly threatened to "blow everybody up" at his former workplace and called himself a "joker," in what is believed to be a reference to last week's mass shooting during a midnight screening of the latest Batman movie in Aurora, Colorado. Prescott reportedly called a colleague, who worked with him at mail services supplier Pitney Bowes, on Monday and repeatedly said, "I am a joker; I'm going to load my guns," according to a search warrant application. He also said he wanted to "see the supervisor's brain splatter all over the sidewalk," according to court records. The colleague, who knew of Prescott's gun collection, alerted police. Prescott had an arsenal of guns, though it wasn't clear how serious he was about the threats he had made to his boss over the telephone. It also wasn't immediately clear when the threat was to be carried out (if ever), but last week's mass shooting during the latest Batman movie — coupled with the "Joker" reference — put police on edge and gave the comments extra urgency. Though there's no other indication of a link to the Colorado shooting, police believe the joker comments were a clear reference to the killings, for which the bellend involved, James Holmes, could be executed. Prescott clearly picked the wrong time to be making such threats, especially when references to the Joker come into play. Families who have lost loved ones are still grieving. This is one of the few times where a Holocaust joke would've been in much better taste. But speaking of movie-theatre shootings, Warner Bros. is rethinking its plans for the film "Gangster Squad" in light of a scene featuring a movie-theatre shooting, but beyond that, Hollywood executives expect little fall-out from the Batman shootings. Officials at Warner Bros. are expected to meet on Monday to discuss whether to remove or edit the "Gangster Squad" shooting scene, or to change the September 7 release date for the film starring Sean Penn and Ryan Gosling, according to a person familiar with the discussions.

The Olympics are officially underway

And so is chemotherapy for a pregnant leukemia patient in the Dominican Republic. Her life was at risk because anti-abortion laws in the Dominican Republic prevented doctors from treating her, but she has started receiving chemo. But instead of breaking laws that I don't really agree with, they could've flown her to nearby Puerto Rico (a territory of the USA) and given her chemo there. It doesn't matter now because she's receiving the chemo, and the treatment should continue because laws against abortion shouldn't be construed as preventing the mother from receiving possibly life-saving treatment. In fact, said laws shouldn't exist, and neither should this: security researchers have discovered a way to replicate a person's eye to bypass iris-scanning security systems. A team at the Universidad Autonoma de Madrid was able to recreate the image of an iris from digital codes of real irises stored in security databases. This new finding raises doubts over what is considered to be one of the most secure methods of biometric security.

2012 already turning into chaos

That's right, 2012 is upon us, and the Olympics have already gone south in at least two ways: first off, the North Korean women's soccer team's game against Colombia had to be delayed by just over an hour because of an incident where South Korea's flag was displayed on a jumbotron in Hampden Park. Second, a Greek triple jumper named Voula Papachristou was expelled from the Olympics after she posted a racist joke on Twitter. The tweets mocked African migrants and expressed support for a far-right political party. An offending message – which was referring to reports of mosquitoes carrying the West Nile virus in her home country – read: ‘With so many Africans in Greece, at least the West Nile mosquitoes will eat home made food!’ I don't know about you, but I think she deserved to be kicked out. That tweet was not only offensive but contrary to Olympic values and ideals, and is just as bad as when Gwyneth Paltrow tweeted the N word while quoting a song title. The Olympic teams - not just Greece, but every other nation - are not just here to get medals but to promote the Olympic ideals and show their character. But I hope she improves her conduct so she has a chance of being selected for the 2016 games in Rio.

Let's wing this one

McDonald’s customers love their chicken served small, in quick-delivery format such as McNuggets and McBites. Which may make their newest test - deep-fried chicken wings - such a no-brainer. Several McDonald’s restaurants in Atlanta, Georgia are testing out the so-called Mighty Wings, which the chain served across the U.S. in the 1990s and has recently offered in Australia and Spain. But according to Danya Proud, a spokeswoman for the fast-food giant, “There are no plans to roll these out nationally.” But they may want to reconsider bringing its wings to other states. A current culinary trend toward snacking and street food as well as dining value is making chicken wings a hot commodity. In fact, McDonald's should bring Mighty Wings to New Zealand, or at least a variation on KFC's Double Down with two all-beef patties replacing the chicken. In other news, Ashton Kutcher made headlines on Monday after paparazzi caught him snuggling with former “That '70s Show” costar Mila Kunis at a party in Hollywood, and Christian Bale has made a surprise visit to the victims of last week's shooting in Colorado.

He did start the fire

In the fourth episode of Summer Heights High, Jonah Takalua falsely accused his father of touching his genitals in order to avoid an assignment for a class he didn't like (to see it, click here and watch from about 4 mins 15 secs into the video). However, that cowardly act is nowhere near as cowardly as this: a civilian employee set fire to a nuclear-powered submarine because he had anxiety and wanted to get out of work early, Navy investigators said in a complaint filed yesterday. Casey James Fury of Portsmouth, New Hampshire, faces up to life in prison if convicted of two counts of arson in the fire aboard the USS Miami attack submarine while it was in dry dock on May 23 and a second blaze outside the sub on June 16. Fury was taking medications for anxiety and depression, and he told investigators he set the fires so he could get out of work, according a seven-page affidavit filed yesterday in a District Court in Portland (the one in Maine, not the one in Oregon that was almost called Boston). The first fire alone took more than 12 hours to extinguish and caused an estimated US$400 million in damage. This is by far the worst thing anybody has ever done to get out of an undesired task. That bellend should go to prison for what he did. In other news, Sally Ride, who was the first American woman in space, died yesterday at the age of 61 after losing her battle with pancreatic cancer. Her first flight, in 1983 aboard the Challenger, came two decades after the Soviets sent a woman named Valentina Tereshkova into space.

WEEKLY GROSS-OUT: Paying for waffles

Or at least that's what the Swedish Young Pirates association thought. They had a tent at a local municipal festival, and were handing out free waffles as an attraction. They were targeted with eviction from the festival, not because they weren’t allowed to make food or give things away (they were), but because the traditional festival waffle makers couldn’t get paid anymore. It sounds like a joke, but it isn’t. In fact, I can't find anything more ridiculous to speak out against this week. As described by Gustav Nipe, chairman of Young Pirate and one of the people giving out waffles at the festival: “Today a lady walked by and complained that we give our waffles away. Apparently, that is horrible behavior as people are trying to sell waffles at the festival, and how could they get paid if there are free waffles?” Instead of selling the waffles for 25 Swedish kronor (about NZ$4.50), the Young Pirates were sharing them for free. They should be praised for this because not every person could afford the 25 kronor necessary to buy the waffles elsewhere. Such a stupid rule against free waffles is only there to protect the business interests of the selfish and money-hungry competition, who only want money just for the sake of having money. If there is a free (or at the very least cheaper) alternative, then that's the one people should go for, hence sites like The Pirate Bay even existing in the first place.

It's Pi Approximation Day again

But I can think of a better reason to bring science into today's post: researchers from UCLA have developed a new transparent solar cell that is a significant step towards giving the windows in homes and other buildings the ability to generate electricity while still being transparent. The research team describes a new kind of polymer solar cell (PSC) that produces energy by absorbing mainly infrared light, not visible light, making the cells nearly 70% transparent to the human eye. They created the device from a photoactive plastic that generates an electrical current from infrared light. In other words, there will soon be even less reason to rely on the electric companies for what has become a basic need in our time. The PSCs are made from plastic-like materials and are lightweight and flexible, and more importantly, they can be produced in high volume at low cost. So once this invention gets off the ground, the money-hungry electric companies could soon be brought to their knees.

Let's AID the disadvantaged against AIDS

Black gay men are routinely at the “back of the line” when it comes to receiving treatment for HIV and AIDS despite being the population most in need, according to a study released this week. Experts say the problem is especially prevalent in Baton Rouge, Louisiana, where black men account for 51 percent of AIDS patients, according to the Louisiana Office of Public Health. The mere fact that a group that should be at the front of the queue is for no good reason shoved to the back is totally unfair and biased. That particular group encounters enough obstacles to treatment (including but not limited to poverty, unemployment, and lack of access to health care) even without racism and homophobia. In other news, last night's deadly shootings at a movie theater in Colorado have briefly silenced the presidential campaign, prompting both Obama and Romney to cut short their schedules and pull advertising in the state out of respect for the victims and their families.

The Death Toll Rises

At least 10 people have been killed and 30 to 40 wounded in a mass shooting at a cinema in Denver during a premiere of the new Batman film The Dark Knight Rises, according to local police. Witnesses saw people running and screaming from the Century Aurora 16 Movie Theater in a mall in the Denver suburb of Aurora. Eyewitnesses reported that a baby was shot at point blank range and some of the victims were children. This is just horrible. It's bad enough the shooter used an emergency exit to sneak in, and if that's all he/she intended to do, then the rap sheet would have stopped at freeloading. But either way, I hope this incident doesn't hurt the movie's chances of turning a profit. In other news, the Double Down comes back to New Zealand on Tuesday. So what does it mean? Cheese, bacon, and secret sauce in between two pieces of chicken.

So shed your skin and let's get tested

A team of researchers has published findings that, they say, indicate criminalisation of HIV may discourage testing and hinder efforts to prevent the spread of the disease. The Canada-based study found that a significant minority of men who have sex with men said that a series high-profile criminal prosecutions related to HIV nondisclosure had impacted their willingness to get tested for the virus or to discuss risk factors with medical professionals. The researchers further reported that these individuals were more likely to engage in higher-risk sexual practices. It is the first empirical evidence to support activists’ contention that HIV-related criminal laws might pose an obstacle to HIV testing. Since these prosecutions tend to target individuals who tested positive for HIV and then allegedly did not disclose that fact to their partners, critics have warned that they create a situation where if you don't know your HIV status, this protects you from arrest, prosecution, and jail time. However, there is a moral basis for the concept of criminal transmission of HIV: the virus has been known to wreak some serious havoc on your immune system, including but not limited to what are known as opportunistic infections. These may be caused by bacteria, viruses, fungi, and parasites that are normally controlled by the immune system. People with HIV/AIDS have an increased risk of developing various viral induced cancers, including but not limited to Kaposi's sarcoma, Burkitt's lymphoma, primary central nervous system lymphoma, and cervical cancer. This is why everybody over the age of 18 should be required by law to undergo compulsory HIV testing every month.

Happy 94th birthday, Nelson Mandela

The Boy Scouts of America announced yesterday that it was affirming, after a secret two-year review, its ban on gay members. The decision elicited widespread criticism and raised questions about whether the world’s largest youth organisation was out of step with the times – and its own principles. The Boys Scouts of America says no gay boys or leaders allowed. The organization upheld its policy after a two-year review brought on by pressure from gay rights groups. Everyone from scout leaders to legal analysts pointed to the cultural currents moving toward more inclusion of gays in US society, from President Obama’s announcement that he now personally supports gay marriage, to the end of the US military’s “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy, to the Episcopal church’s decision to bless same-sex unions. The Boy Scouts are on the wrong side of history on this issue and will “wither away” if it sticks to this policy. Gays are people as well. They're here, they're queer, and the Boy Scouts should just get used to it instead of shunning them. Scouting should be for everyone, so the best solution would be to start another more inclusive scouting association. In other news, Romanian president Traian Basescu is likely to be impeached by voters in a referendum on July 29 (not this coming Sunday, but the Sunday after), an opinion poll showed today, providing turnout is high enough to make the vote valid.

Back behind bars for the big disgrace

Keeping track of women’s hemlines is, admittedly, an unusual way to judge the mind-set of a country’s leader. But that is just what veteran North Korea watchers have resorted to in trying to peer into one of the world’s most isolated countries and divine what its new young leader, Kim Jong-un, is thinking. For weeks now, those analysts have puzzled over photos of women sporting miniskirts and heels in downtown Pyongyang, a stunning change from the years when Western wear was mostly shunned in favor of billowy traditional dresses or drab Mao-style work uniforms. But enough about that: Hosni Mubarak (brown streak in picture) was abruptly moved from the relative comfort of a military hospital back to prison yesterday after the country’s public prosecutor ruled that he was fit to serve his time behind bars. A medical committee that was convened to review Mr. Mubarak’s medical condition decided that he needed only routine medical care, according to a statement by Adel el-Said, the spokesman for the prosecutor. That finding apparently ruled out a transfer abroad or to another medical facility, which Mr. Mubarak’s lawyers have demanded, and within hours, Mr. Mubarak was transferred back to Tora Prison, from where he should never have been allowed to venture. He was like a skidmark on the recently-washed underpants of Egyptian society, and he should have just been left to rot in the slammer. Better yet, they should have burned him alive.

WEEKLY GROSS-OUT: Poll taxes

In 1964, the American people enacted the 24th Amendment, to prevent the exclusion of the poor from the ballot box. In Eric H. Holder Junior's speech last week at the NAACP convention, the U.S. Attorney-General wasn't indulging in election-year rhetoric when he condemned voter photo identification laws in Texas as a poll tax that could do just that. He was speaking the hard legal truth. The Justice Department would be right to challenge this new law as an unconstitutional poll tax. The department has temporarily blocked the Texas law under special provisions of the Voting Rights Act that prevent states with a history of discrimination from disadvantaging minority groups. But the Attorney-General should go further and raise a 24th Amendment challenge against Texas and other states that are joining the effort to bar the poor from the polls. This exclusionary campaign should not be allowed to destroy a great constitutional achievement of the civil rights revolution. And besides, the whole point of the poll taxes in the first place was to keep as many black people as possible out of the voting booths. But the states can no longer do that because the 24th Amendment forbids the imposition of "any poll tax or other tax" in federal elections. Texas state law flatly violates this provision in dealing with would-be voters who don't have a state-issued photo ID. To obtain an acceptable substitute, they must travel to a driver's license office and submit appropriate documents, along with their fingerprints, to establish their qualifications. If they don't have the required papers, they must pay $22 for a copy of their birth certificate and if they can't come up with the money for the qualifying documents, they can't vote. But the 24th Amendment denies states the power to create such a financial barrier to the ballot box, and this violation is particularly blatant. In drafting its law, the Legislature rejected a provision that would have provided free copies of the necessary documents. Rather than paying for this service out of the general revenue fund, it chose to disqualify voters who couldn't pay the fee. This is precisely the choice forbidden by the Constitution, and as a result of this, somebody needs to challenge such flawed decision-making.

Look ma, no cords

One reason electric and plug-in hybrid vehicles have hit the market with a thud is that there are strings attached: drivers of models such as the Chevrolet Volt and Nissan Leaf must plug something in to recharge the battery. That's why a number of companies are developing ways to cut the cord, one of these being to replenish the battery wirelessly with a mat that sits on the floor. Coils on the underside of the car engage the charger when the car is parked over them. The mats are plugged in while the car isn't. This could be a great step towards reducing the amount of petrol we use over time (as well as the amount of money spent on petrol and the amount of petrol that gets stolen), and automakers and suppliers expect to have the chargers ready for sale around 2015. That's still a wee way away, but then one also won't have to worry about whether the plug that came with their car will fit the socket at a charging point overseas.

All Thaied up and no place to go

Today is Bastille Day. But this is not the topic of today's post. Neither is the Tongan royal wedding a couple of days ago, when Crown Prince Tupouto'a 'Ulukalala married a cousin of his named Sinaitakala Fakafanua. But here's the ugly news of the day: a seriously ill New Zealander stuck in a Thai hospital has had a crushing setback. He has been kicked out for not paying enough of his medical bill. New Zealanders have now donated more than $8000 to get Sean Kenzie home after his motorbike accident, but that's not enough for hospital management who last night sent him packing. That's right, Sean Kenzie has now been shunted out of the private hospital he was in after his near-fatal crash – straight into what he calls a Government-owned hellhole. "There are rats running across the ground, geckos running up the walls,” he says. “It's not a hospital. It's a place you come to die." I think somebody should just fly him back to New Zealand to get treated because right now, he's in a room with 50 other people and they've got them stacked into the hallways and doorways. He's having to clean and look after his own wounds. That is just wrong and what Mr Kenzie needs right now is help from the Ministry of Foreign Affairs. They could get him back home for some real medical care. In other news, the International Criminal Court is set to launch a formal preliminary examination into the New Zealand Government's antenatal Down syndrome screening programme.

Candyman, candyman, candyman!

That's right, today is Friday the 13th, and speaking of 13, a 13-year-old boy is in intensive care in Beijing after two immature bellends assaulted him by releasing compressed air into his body using a mechanical pump at an automobile repair shop. Chinese media reported that the boy, Du Chuanwang, who lives in Shandong Province on China's east coast, suffered from dozens of puncture wounds in his intestines and multiple organ failure. The boy helped out at the auto repair shop, where two co-workers allegedly inserted the nozzle of an air pump into his anus and filled his body with air. The suspects have been detained. Local police posted a message last week on Sina Weibo, China's microblogging site, saying that the two men pushed the boy to the ground during the attack, and that the incident was a prank. But still, this is just not on. Some pranks can land you in serious trouble, like in the fifth episode of Summer Heights High, when Jonah Takalua MMSed a picture of his buttocks to several teachers. He was lucky not to get expelled for that immature carry-on, and those two idiots would be similarly lucky to avoid jail time for their nonsense.

Obama, Obama, whatcha gonna do?

How is it that a state where cities are declaring bankruptcy with the regularity of a Yosemite geyser votes to approve roughly $10 billion in new bonds to build a high-speed rail line from one unimportant rural town to another? That is exactly the situation in California, where sandwiched between the bankruptcy filings of Stockton and San Bernardino was a state Senate vote to approve bond issuance for the first leg of what is conservatively estimated to be a US$68 billion bullet train. It will carry passengers from San Francisco to Los Angeles and back beginning in 2030, with the first leg between Merced and Bakersfield. This is quite an ambitious project, but it is ethically and morally unjustifiable at this stage. There are two bankrupt cities within the state and they could really use some of that money. The Mayans were right about 2012, and the green pig in all this may well be Obama. He has had nearly four years to straighten this mess out, but nothing has been done. And speaking of green pigs, Rovio Mobile's latest game, Amazing Alex, has finally launched for iOS and Android devices. The game sees you manipulating physics along with different objects in order to solve puzzles. There are around 100 levels and 35 objects that can be utilised in order to complete the game.

All the books are red

California is heading for a record almond harvest this fall. A combination of nearly perfect weather and millions of healthy, robust honeybees is expected to yield 2.1 billion pounds of nuts, the biggest crop in history. The harvest starts in late August in the southern San Joaquin Valley and continues through October in the Sacramento Valley. The U.S. Department of Agriculture pegs it as 5% above a May forecast and 3% above 2011's previous record of 2 billion pounds (over 900 million kg). But here's another issue brewing in the same state: San Bernardino’s City Council voted to become the third California city this year to file for bankruptcy, as it struggles with declining tax revenue, growing employee costs, and accounting discrepancies in its ledgers. The council voted 4 to 2, with one abstention, last night to authorize a filing under Chapter 9 of U.S. bankruptcy law. The city of 209,000, about 65 miles (105 kilometers) east of Los Angeles, is apparently so broke it can’t make its August 15 payroll. What's needed over the next five weeks is aggressive collection of back taxes, and if there's still a massive deficit by the time the almond harvest starts making money, maybe some of the profits could go to helping San Bernadino and others out of their financial quagmires. Also heading into the financial black hole is Portugal, whose international creditors may soon have to ease terms of the country’s bailout to prevent the plan from derailing as the government faces setbacks in attaining its deficit goals. Prime Minister Pedro Passos Coelho’s struggle to meet deficit pledges were further hampered last week when about 2 billion euros ($2.5 billion) of planned cuts to pensions and civil servants’ holiday pay were ruled unconstitutional. With Portugal’s 10-year bond yield above 10 percent, returning to the markets next year may be untenable, requiring more international aid despite the premier’s insistence he won’t seek concessions.

Start spreading the news, he's leaving today

Reggie Jackson has been banned indefinitely by the New York Yankees after he made disparaging comments about Alex Rodriguez published in last week's edition of Sports Illustrated. He told Sports Illustrated: "Al's a very good friend, but I think there are real questions about his numbers. As much as I like him, what he admitted about his usage does cloud some of his records." Jackson confirmed to USA TODAY Sports that, as a result, he has been asked to stay away from the team. Jackson, choosing his words carefully, said: "The Yankees think that the timing is not right for me to be around the team right now. When the Yankees feel that the timing is proper, I'll return." What one has to remember here is that an indefinite ban is NOT necessarily a life ban, and I hope Reggie can one day return to the Yankees, or at the very least find work on another team in the major leagues. But for now, he should be making the most of his free time. And speaking of time, Spain will be given some relief today from its austerity woes when its EU partners grant it extra time to meet its steep budget deficit targets which otherwise risk deepening its recession. But in return, prime minister Mariano Rajoy will commit to a fresh round of tax increases, likely to be announced this week, to shore up revenues and help tackle the country's structural or underlying deficit. And speaking of deficit, the Vatican has registered one of its worst budget deficits in years, plunging back into the red with a €15 million deficit in 2011 after a brief respite of profit.

WEEKLY GROSS-OUT: Photoshop

Photoshop is just lame. All it does is take the authenticity out of photos. And that is why somewhere between school and her extracurricular activities, ballet dancer Julia Bluhm found time to launch a crusade against airbrushed images in one of the country's top teen magazines. And this week, she won: Seventeen magazine pledged not to digitally alter body sizes or face shapes of young women featured in its editorial pages, largely in response to the online petition Julia started earlier this year. After hearing too many fellow teens in her ballet class complain about their weight, the 14-year-old started her campaign in April with a petition on Change.org. It called for the magazine to print one unaltered photo spread each month. It's a start, but it could be better. It is possible to go an entire issue without resorting to that Photoshop crap.

They can't touch him... Can't touch him...

A deadline for WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange to be extradited to Sweden for questioning in sexual assault allegations came and went Saturday with no apparent movement. Assange is believed to still be inside the Ecuadorian Embassy in London, where he has been holed up since applying for political asylum on June 19. The South American country has said it is considering his application, and I hope he gets it because despite him being an Australian, I believe he has done good for the world. The sexual assault charges are only there to allow Sweden to hold him while a grand jury in the States builds their case to extradite him to be prosecuted for his work with WikiLeaks. Besides, the cops can't do anything because even though Assange is in violation of his bail by staying at the embassy, and that ignoring the notice to turn himself in is a further violation, they are unable to enter the embassy under diplomatic protocol. I hope Ecuador doesn't bowl him underarm by denying his application for asylum. In other news, a lifeguard fired for leaving his post so he could save a swimmer outside his coverage zone said on Thursday that he has been offered his job back, but he says he does not plan to return to work.

7/7 turns 7 today

For those of you who have been living under a rock for the last seven years, 7/7 was a bombing that involved three underground trains and one bus in London. A similar attack was carried out on four different vehicles two weeks later. But let's get onto something more serious: An Argentinian court has found two former dictators guilty of stealing dozens of babies during the country's dirty war. Jorge Rafael Videla, who ruled as a dictator between 1976 to 1981, was sentenced to 50 years in prison. General Reynaldo Benito Bignone, who ruled the country from June 1982 until the nation's return to democracy in December 1983, was sentenced to 15 years in prison. They were the two most high-profile defendants found guilty on Thursday of systematically stealing babies from political prisoners and giving them new identities. It's about time those child-snatchers got their just deserts. Those dictators needed to be taught a lesson. For any citizen who lives in a country where actions like this do not remain unpunished with the passage of time, the guilty verdicts represent a guarantee that justice is done.

Bieber back in the beaver

Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez have reportedly broken up multiple times in the last few months. The pop stars most recently decided to end their relationship last week but have since rekindled and are giving their relationship another try. The two have been dating for around a year and a half and while Gomez has maintained her squeaky clean image, Bieber has been faced with some controversy recently. Recent reports claimed that Bieber may have to face jail if convicted on criminal charges for an altercation with a photographer. Also, he recently said he thinks he could take One Direction in a fight. I'd like to see that douche try to hold his own against the British five-piece band, who were recently told that Pineapple Lumps were Australian (which they're not). And speaking of One Direction, Niall Horan has been caught on camera swearing at a bunch of fans at Dublin Airport. The Irish singer, who arrived back home following the end of a US tour earlier this week, can be heard in the clip lightheartedly calling six girls a "shower of c***s". According to Digital Spy, the fans uploaded the footage onto YouTube, insisting that Niall did not mean to offend them with his explicit language and that instead, it was just aimed at them as banter. In other news, around 1000 Kiwis could be affected by an internet outage on Monday as a result of a long-running trojan virus, according to Internet New Zealand. The non-profit organisation is urging people to ensure their computers have not been infected by a virus called DNSChanger that has been active globally since 2007. It can reportedly infect both Mac and Windows computers, and it changes a computer's DNS settings to point to rogue servers, essentially redirecting legitimate web-surfing to malicious sites that attempt to acquire personal information and then generate illegitimate advertising revenue.

Lifeguard sacked for guarding life

Tomas Lopez says he never thought getting fired would make him so popular. But since his controversial firing on Monday, the 21-year-old former lifeguard from Florida said his phone has been ringing off the hook from journalists trying to get his side of the story. "The reason I was fired is just ridiculous," Lopez told CNN late last night. "It is a ridiculous rule, really. What was I supposed to do? Just let the guy drown?" I wouldn't have. His employer's reason? Orlando-based Jeff Ellis and Associates, the company Lopez worked for, says lifeguards cannot go beyond the perimeter of the beach they are responsible for overseeing. But that day, a beachgoer rushed to Lopez's lifeguard station to alert him to a man who was drowning. Even though Lopez knew the man was some 1,500 feet outside the company's protection zone in an area where signs warn visitors to swim at their own risk, he ran into the ocean toward the struggling man and pulled him ashore. Going beyond his protection zone in a possible life-or-death situation is not a reason to punish such a heroic act. Lifeguards are supposed to help people around water because that's their job. This particular lifeguard went above and beyond the call of duty to rescue a swimmer in need of his services, and I would've given him a raise for it instead of belly-aching about him venturing outside his perimeter. How any employer would fire an employee for doing their job is just stupid.

Cooper's out for summer, Cooper's out forever

That's right, Anderson Cooper's out of the closet. To sum it up, he's here, he's queer, get used to it. But we've got more serious issues to deal with:

• More than two years after releasing its game-changing tablet computer, Apple now actually owns the name "iPad." A Chinese court says the company has paid $60 million to Taiwanese firm Shenzhen Proview Technology for the rights, nailing down the name as its own in a country that is increasingly becoming a huge market for electronics. This is a well-deserved victory for Apple, even though they had to pay for it. Maybe they should buy the Android name from Google in a similar manner.
• Manchester United said yesterday that it plans to raise about $100 million in an initial public offering of its shares in the United States. Man United has a powerful brand (although not the Premier League title) but also a high level of debt, and they are raising that money to pay some of their debt off before next season. I hope they do, and I hope it doesn't turn into a PR disaster like Facebook's IPO earlier this year.
• Everyone's made a joke they thought was funny only to see it fall flat, but Park Jung-geun's attempt at humour could see him jailed for up to seven years in South Korea. Park, a photographer by profession, re-tweeted some messages from North Korea's official twitter feed, such as reports on the late leader Kim Jong Il's travels across the country and negative tweets about South Korea. He also took a photo of himself holding a whiskey bottle and edited in a North Korean flag as a background for a joke. His supporters then doctored a North Korean military poster, replacing a smiling soldier with a sad photo of Park and the image of the gun with another whiskey bottle. I don't believe that he's a North Korean spy, but this is one of the worst ideas for a joke (click here and scroll to about one minute into the video to see another bad idea for a joke in action) and he should at least be made to realise that there are consequences for this.

Expensive houseboat ahoy!

Julian Assange and Rupert Murdoch share symmetry in their nationality, notoriety, and love of publishing. And both are household names in their homeland. After the Levesen Inquiry into press standards in the UK, there seems little we don't know about the modus operandi of Murdoch's British news empire. Of Assange, Australians are still trying to put the pieces together. What they know of the silver-haired founder of WikiLeaks is that he is in a whole lot of trouble holed up in the Ecuadorian Embassy in London, that a lot of high profile people support him, and that the Australian Government seems to be unenthusiastic at best about helping him. I'm surprised at this. The first people to settle in Australia, besides the Aboriginal people, were British convicts. And through the fog of legal proceedings to get Assange to face questioning in Sweden and his claims that this is a ruse to allow the Americans to extradite him for espionage, there is evidence that a lot of Australians believe that, as one of them, he has a right to expect his government to protect him from America, if not the questioning in Sweden.

But for those not using Ecuador to escape extradition, there is a completely decadent waste of money called the Orsos Island (pictured), which is the passion project of Hungarian-born Gabor Orsos, a former hotelier who wanted to combine the perks of a luxury hotel with the flexibility of a super-yacht. This super-expensive houseboat offers six ensuite double bedrooms spread over three floors and 1,000 square meters (nearly four tennis courts) worth of luxury living space. Although it doesn't come with an actual tennis court, those longing for some sub-aquatic snooker will be relieved to learn that there is a large games room in the island's "hull." The underwater karaoke suite, meanwhile, is ideal for those who's singing voice is best kept a safe distance from civilization. The island also comes complete with all the usual ocean-bound comforts of the mega-rich: a Jacuzzi, a barbecue, sun loungers, a minibar, a stately dining room, and an aquarium. The price of all this is about NZ$8 million and just because you can afford all this doesn't mean you'll ever need it.

WEEKLY GROSS-OUT: Galaxy Nexus

But before I start on that abomination, congratulations are in order for Spain's second consecutive Euro victory. But onto the main story: Samsung Electronics asked a U.S. federal court over the weekend for a temporary stay on its preliminary injunction on the sale of the Galaxy Nexus smartphone in the U.S., pending the company's appeal. Judge Lucy H. Koh of the U.S. District Court for the Northern District of California, San Jose Division, granted a preliminary injunction against the Galaxy Nexus and any product that is no more than colorably different from the specified product and infringes U.S. Patent No. 8,086,604. But here's a good reason why they should ban Androids from the market: the iPhone is clearly the better product. Android devices are for those who have no life, for instance, Mitt Romney, who wants to completely stuff up Obamacare if elected President.

Ecuador has him now

Wikileaks founder Julian Assange faced a "difficult choice" in defying a British police order, one of his lawyers has said. Mr Assange was confronted with risks no matter which path he took and is gambling that Ecuador will look sympathetically at his request for political asylum, said Michael Ratner, a human rights lawyer who is on Mr Assange's legal defence team. The 40-year-old Australian refused to comply with a British police order to turn himself in for extradition to Sweden and instead walked into the Ecuadoran embassy in London on June 19, asking for asylum. Mr Assange faces questioning in Sweden over sexual assault allegations but he denies the allegations and insists it is part of a politically-motivated effort to get him extradited to the United States, where he fears he could be put on trial for espionage or other crimes. Confronted with the option of being transferred to a Swedish prison without the possibility of seeking political asylum, Mr Assange made an understandable decision. I too would've fled if I was in a similar predicament. Mr Assange's concerns that he could be prosecuted in a US court for serious crimes are well-founded, given details that have emerged about a grand jury investigation, public warnings from top US officials, and reported questioning of WikiLeaks associates. He is a whistle-blowing hero, and he should stay inside Ecuador's embassy on diplomatic territory lest the cops come after him.