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31 March 2013

Is everyone enjoying Easter?

Manchester United ground out a gritty, yet invaluable win over Sunderland this morning at Stadium of Light to extend a record-breaking start to the Barclays Premier League season. Robin van Persie's 27th-minute strike deflected off Phil Bardsley and Titus Bramble (who was credited with the goal) for the only goal of the game, making United the only team to win 25 of the first 30 games of a top flight season in England. There were four yellow cards.

Because today is the last day of the month, we have one important piece of business to attend to. The Bellend of the Month for March 2013 is Cory J. Feerick. He is a 33-year-old from Brookfield, Wisconsin, who is being charged with five misdemeanor counts of stealing flush valves from fast food restaurants and university toilets and urinals. For nearly four months, police from several departments were investigating multiple thefts of flush valves from toilets and urinals in public restrooms. Feerick reportedly stole roughly US$35,000 worth of the devices, and if convicted, Feerick could spend to 9 to 45 months in jail, and pay between US$10,000 and US$50,000 in fines. Seriously, guys, it's not worth it.

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